Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Randomize
