One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
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