yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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