I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
Randomize
