There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize
