there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
The air taste purple.
Randomize
