He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
