it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
