We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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