I need help removing her.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
