So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
