ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Your cock deserves a montage
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize