Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
