we're blogging at a bar
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
