Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
