Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize
