Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
We have so much sex to catch up on
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Randomize