It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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