He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
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