His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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