haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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