It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Randomize
