I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
