I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
You dont lie about slip and slides
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Randomize
