He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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