yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Can I color on your dick again?
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
