So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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