ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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