My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
