we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Randomize
