I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize