Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Shame is for Republicans.
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