and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
