Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
