you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Randomize
