so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Randomize
