i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Randomize
