You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
