Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
