i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
