um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Randomize
