Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Randomize
