yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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