I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
