Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Randomize
