do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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