Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Randomize