she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
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