is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
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