I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Randomize
