I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
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